themeltingpot

Now is year 2008, exactly what we call it 21st century. Should most of us accepted love is among both 2 persons, but a business deal, or a handshake deal from parents who dictate your whole life. Recently, on a chat forum, I met this lady who told us about her story. Her marriage was based on arrangement by both side parents, she didn’t have the say. After number of years, they have a daughter, and she doesn’t want her daughter follow her footstep. She has to let her choose the love of her life, not like her mother, who was weak, and regret her whole life for to be obedience.

After I heard her story, I was sympathetic to her situation. I believe that some of Asian countries, still today, they practice fixed marriage for their children. It was a tradition pass on from generation to generation. Even a person found his/her own love, they couldn’t be rebellion to their parents’ decision. From some Indian movies, I can see their culture was also involve with arrangement marriage. Woman’s destiny was totally controlled under their parents. The parents seek a matching family, and they agree on a time to meet. The matching family bring their girl / boy to meet the agreed family. The total conversation was holding under both side parents discussing. If the conditions were matched, the marriage will strike a deal. Both of the girl and boy were silently agree to it. What a comedy. Can’t they have their own saying to this deal? Shouldn’t they choose their own fate instead of their parent’s make it for them?

Recently, my female cousin met this guy. They were together for 1 year and half. My cousin is totally fall in love with him, and he just proposed to my cousin. But my cousin need her boyfriend to have stable home first, he must has his own house as primary condition. On several occasions, my cousin was fighting her own right, and against my aunt. I agree with her decision, she should choose my own life, instead of a stringed puppet, control by others. I hope that she will convince her parents, but it probably take some time and persistent.

I hope that everyone here, who is on our generation, should stand up and hold their destiny on their hands, instead of letting someone choose it for you. Arrangement marriage and fixed marriage should be banned. We all should have own choice to pick the one we love.

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